Men Jokes

Being blond, I know first hand what it's like to have someone crack a joke at your expense.  So, in the spirit of making people smile here's something about men in general to tickle your funny bone:

How many honest, intelligent me in the world does it take to do the dishes?
Both of them

Why did the man cross the road?
He heard the chicken was easy

Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time

Why does it take one million sperm to fertilize one egg?
They don't stop to ask for directions

How does a man show that he's planning for the future?
He buys two cases of beer

What's the difference between men and government bonds?
The bonds mature

Why are blond jokes so short?
So men can remember them

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
Don't know; it's never happened

Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
They already have boyfriends

Why do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow

When do you care for a man's company?
When he owns it

Why are married women heavier then single women?
Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.  Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge